“Is It Still Cheating If I Don't Get Caught?,” written specifically for ’tweens and teens, has been a fun discussion launcher for my family after dinner when we gather to read a section chosen by one of my kids. More than fun, however, this book has been truly transformational.
Like “Ethical Intelligence” and “The Good Ones,” "Is It Still Cheating If I Don't Get Caught?" is an easy-to-read, lively book that’s focused on helping kids navigate everyday challenges, especially during the teen years. And it’s perfectly tailored to kids with relatable language and references, illustrations, and a Q & A format interrupted by a “What Do You Think?” list of options, which my kids love!
The book begins by acknowledging that life is challenging, and sometimes it’s hard to know what to do. Dr. Weinstein, a renowned ethicist, asks kids pressing questions along a spectrum of situations. In one chapter, for example, he asks: “Is it wrong to tell the end of a movie to someone who hasn’t had a chance to see the movie yet? Are there circumstances in which copying answers on a test could be okay? Do you deserve to keep a high grade if the teacher made a mistake?”
The answers are in his Five Life Principles, which, he states, are all your child needs for making the best possible decisions. “They provide the foundation for doing the right thing anywhere, anytime you’re faced with the question: ‘What should I do?’ ” Dr. Weinstein points out that by using these tools, kids are empowered to consistently make the best possible choices and to be the best person one can be. “Living ethically isn’t only the right thing to do. It’s the only way to live well.” I couldn’t agree more, and I want my kids to believe and experience this, too, so I value this book as a resource.
While my kids have solid values and a strong moral compass, the real-life scenarios in this book have prompted them to talk about (and use the words) “integrity” and “trustworthiness,” and think ahead about challenges and unsettling behaviors they might come across at school. The book also has inspired them to talk with one another about these situations and how they might respond when faced with dilemmas. (My son and daughter are just 12 and 9 years old, so I find this pretty awesome.)
Their engagement regarding doing the right thing and evaluating situations and options prompted me to keep a list of Dr. Weinstein’s “Five Life Principles” both on a bulletin board in our house and in my car; I refer to both daily, and we continue to discuss these principles.
One of the many gems in this book is an ending page titled “How to Get a Good Night’s Sleep.” It lists five questions related to the “Five Life Principles” and a few encouraging, kid-friendly notes. Reviewing these together at the end of an evening gives children the opportunity to mindfully reflect on their day and discuss challenges and victories, which can certainly help promote a good night’s sleep and empower them.
“Is It Still Cheating If I Don’t Get Caught?” makes a great gift that children, teens, and young adults can refer to as a personal check-and-balance for doing the right thing and living well. For my kids, it’s a must-have. As the perfect guide for young, developing minds that are often confused as they navigate the challenges of new and sometimes confusing experiences, this book will help support them in living with ethical intelligence so they become responsible, compassionate, and productive critical thinkers who enjoy the best quality of life possible. What more could a parent want?
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